twist a wish

Granted

But she ends up being a man and you end up turning gay never looking at female in the same way again. (no offense on ur mum church!)


I wish i had Tony Blair

granted

but you have to shag cherrie blair
(leave my mum alone)
lol

i wish i was punk rocker with flowers in my hair

granted

but you get confused for a woman and have tonnes of hippy guys hitting on you.

i wish emma rigby would leave me alone.

granted, but the she becomes ur stalker and she falls in love with you, u tell her to fuck off but she just wants you more and more, until you end up fucking her to get rid, then you fall in love with her and u all end up happily ever after

i wish i could leave work right now and play cs

Granted


But on the way home from work your foot blows up for no reason, leaving you in hospital for a year and 4 days.


I wish i could sort my p.c out.

granted
but when you sort it out you sort it out too well and it becomes so good it takes over the world and creates a series of events equal to terminator 1,2 and 3.

i wish for sarah chalk!!!

Granted

but too bad she died of old age

I wish I did own playboy mansion

granted
but because of that, everyone thinks you are a pervert, even the girls so you die a lonely man.

i wish i was 6 foot 4 (im 6 foot 3 as it is)

granted
well u actually make it to 6ft 6 but then both of ur feet are cut off and part of ur legs so actually u r now only 5ft 3

I wish that Sheffield United win today

granted

but they will ahve 3 players ban for next match and 4 of the them will get inj

I wish for a succubus

Granted


But in your dreams so has sex with you so many times that when you wake up and look in the mirror u look like a shriveld prune and then keel over and freeze to death.


I wish I could watch Sarah chalke and Jessica Alba fight in skimpy clothing while in a jelly pool.

hehe

granted

but Jessica alba is so hot that u will get blinded and Sarah will take advantic of that and screws u

I wish for hell to freeze over

Granted

But all of the evil people learn how to ice skate and then come to earth to preform The High School Musical on Ice while wer trapped to our seats


I wish that i could have a trained pet monkey

granted

but a grapefruit the size of japan and an orange the size of jamaica squash bill clinton causing a world wide ban on pet monkeys, eventually you and your pet monkey are caught and thrown into a volcano =]

i wish i knew what women wanted

granted

but then you have 2 look like mel gibson cuz of the film "what women want"
AND
you learn they are actually very simple and die from the shock of how simple they are.

i wish i was the king of england!

Granted

but the french will see it as a weakness and pwn your ass back to the stoneage

I wish I wasent so evil

granted

but your soo nice you skip around in a pink frilly dress singing "i am kava the gay" and then everyone @ SBK laughs at you for being such a poof =]

i wish sarah michelle gellar was a vampire so i could force my sharp proddy thing into her

hehe

Granted

but u are so weak that she makes u into a thrall

I wish I was a prinsess


my bordom is killing me

lol granted

but see last entry by church. lol nah you are a princess but have the genetils of a man, so you marry a prince with a HUGE rod and u get anally rapped pretty bad

i wish kava wasn't bored

granted

but hes gonna watch sg1 now so the bordom will perhaps disapair

I wish infinity wishes

granted

but you run out of things to wish for and get a brain hemerage trying to think of a wish then implode =]

i wish for a grapefruit

Granted

But as it is the grapefruit the size of Japan it falls on your heade breaking both of your legs rendering you paralyzed so you cant escape while him and and the Jamacian sized Orange have there way with you.

I wish that i had a squllion monies

granted

but you dont know what to do with it so it just sits in a bank gradually gettin larger untill you own everythin... hold on that aint bad!!!

i wish for a rod the size of japan

ha Granted



You get this rod and realize that due to ite enormus size it is making you jealous so you get surgery to enlarge your willy to tha same length, wen you come around your realise that all the blood in your body is currently living in your penis and from that day forawrd you become the "Living penis man"


I wish that i could be a bush master like Ray Mears

granted

but you become so involved in bushes you then get a tea bush that becomes eadible overnight but you eat the bush nd then ray mears gets inside your for the 5ht time this week

i wish i was a vegetarian